Where Can Cloud Poop? - Take the Toilet Tour of OG FFVII
Written by AffectorOfChange
Where It Started
I loaded up FFVII Remake, excited to experience the story of Final Fantasy VII in a new way, and was shocked and dismayed by what had changed. Although FFVII was not my first Final Fantussy, I developed a great fondness for Cloud, Aerith, Tifa, and the journey of all these characters. The tale woven in this game resonated with me as a formative experience. This game helped me to learn that video games are an amazing vector for telling a story. As I explored Remake, I started to notice that something was missing – where were all the toilets that I remembered?
I hadn’t realized how important those toilets were to my immersion into the world of Gaia until they were not present in both FFVII Remake and FFVII Rebirth. Playing this game in my youth is a large reason why I think I often include restrooms in my D&D battle maps that I create. Cloud does get to have a similar Shinra HQ bathroom air duct scene in Remake, but that was the only time I remember encountering a bathroom on our reimagined adventure!
I’m currently streaming a Monochrome Materia challenge run of OG FFVII and thought for fun, we could track how many toilets we encounter on our quest! Below is a spoiler-free guide to the FFVII Toilet Tour.
TL;DR – There are 27 total in all of Gaia.
The First Toilet - Sector 7
After completing the bombing of Mako Reactor 1, Barret Wallace and the crew of Avalanche gather at the bar Seventh Heaven in Sector 7 to debrief. They are on a mission to save the planet. The Shinra Electric Power Company has been draining the planet of its life force and converting it to electricity, or Mako, slowly killing the planet in the process.
Cloud shows off his skills here of being an emotionally unavailable emo kid (who probably just has PTSD) and we are introduced to the bartender, Tifa Lockheart. After Barret pays Cloud his mercenary commission, the various buildings in Sector 7 become available to explore.
Head up to the north house, where a lovely older couple reminisces about their son who has gone off and joined the Shinra military (why does an electric company have a whole military force anyway?).
It is here in their home that you find the Toilet 01 of FFVII. Be warned – this area of the game will be come inaccessible in the future, so be sure to visit it now if you’re planning to tour them all.
Wall Market: Home of Two Pots
The next story beat of the game where you can tour toilets is Wall Market. This vibrant shopping center in Sector 6 is home to one of my favorite parts of OG FFVII – cross dressing for daddy!
While collecting the various clothing and accessories for Cloud’s ultimate femme glam, be sure to visit both the inn and the karaoke bar as they are home to Toilet 02 and Toilet 03 in the game.
If you miss these toilets on your tour, do not fret. Later on in Disc 2 you can dig up the Key to Sector 5 in Bone Village after Cloud returns to the party. This will let you back into this area of Midgar.
Shinra HQ is a Pooping Paradise
After Cloud’s next mission with Avalanche, we lose access to Sector 7. It’s time to take Shinra head on and ascend Shinra HQ!
As we climb the tower, we learn that every floor past the 59th Floor requires a special key card to gain entry.
There are three important floors for our Toilet Tour:
Toilets 04 through 07 are found on the 64th Floor, north of the resting area where there is a save point.
Toilets 08 and 09 are to the west of the executive conference room on the 66th Floor, which is home to the iconic air duct scene. Something stinks indeed, Scarlet.
Lastly for Shinra HQ, there are 6x toilets on the 67th Floor, one in each of the prison cells (Toilets 10 through 15).
Be sure to use the toilet here before leaving, because it will be some time before we find the next toilet on our quest.
With only 27 total toilets on the planet, Midgar seems to be the place to go if you really need to poop as it hosts more than half of the toilets in the world. However, Shinra HQ houses most of these toilets.
You only have access here twice in a playthrough, so be sure to document your toilet tour when you’re here!
Better hold it until the beach
That’s right – we explore Kalm, the Chocobo Ranch, Fort Condor, and all of Junon with no toilet in sight!
After you take the cargo ship across the sea, we arrive in Costa Del Sol, home to 3 toilets on our Toilet Tour.
Toilet 16 is found in the Villa that can be purchased when you accumulate some gil later down the road.
Toilet 17 is located in the vacation house that Johnny is hanging at, just past the bar/weapon shop near where the kids are playing ball.
Toilet 18 is nestled in the vacation house you rest in when you come to town. During Cloud’s first arrival, Barret can be found checking himself out in his cute little sailor outfit here.
Rocket Town: The safest place for Cloud to poop
We pass through Corel, the Gold Saucer, Gongaga, Cosmo Canyon, and Nibelheim without a single toilet to be found. It isn’t until we reach Rocket Town past Mt. Nibel that we finally get to poop in peace. Outside of Shinra HQ, this is the most concentrated amount of toilets in Gaia, at least one per house and three in the inn!
Toilet 19 is in the weapon shop as you first enter town.
Toilet 20 can be located near the bar of the inn. Head upstairs and you will find both Toilet 21 and Toilet 22.
Toilet 23 is found in the house on the far left of town.
Toilet 24 is located in the item shop.
Toilet 25 can be found in Cid’s house, where Shera is prepping some tea.
Toilet 26 is in the old man’s house to the far east.
If there’s anywhere you might need to go potty, Rocket Town is surely the place!
The final toilet
The last, and final toilet, on the Toilet Tour of OG FFVII is located in the far north in Icicle Inn.
Toilet 27 is in the basement of the Inn here. Enter the door next to the stairwell and you will see the door that says “Rest Room” below!
Congratulations on finding every single toilet in Final Fantasy Seven! Which toilet on the tour is your favorite?
Consider on your next playthrough joining on this tour to visit every toilet in FFVII by sharing your screenshots or clips. You can either tag me (AffectorOfChange) or consider using the hashtag #FFVIIToiletTour.