Emotion Regulation 101 - How to PLEASE Your Body and Mind for Better Balance
You thought you were going to get out of class today, didn't you? I don't see a valid excuse here. Have a seat and welcome to AffectorOfChange’s Emotion Regulation 101, where we take some time out of our day to review basic mental health tips.
Today, we're going to talk about these little habits you all have, where you scroll, stay up all night, and do all the worrying in the world.
It's not doing you any good.
So today, we're going to discuss the PLEASE skill from DBT.
If you don't know me already, I’m AffectorOfChange. I'm a licensed clinical social worker and certified in EMDR therapy. In my day-to-day job, I treat PTSD and other trauma-related concerns. Let’s break down the basics of the DBT skill PLEASE.
What is the PLEASE Skill?
PLEASE is an acronym that comes from Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), pioneered by Marsha Linehan.
To practice this skill, you need to PLEASE take care of your body, so that you can PLEASE take care of your mind.
Physical Illness
The "P" and "L" in PLEASE stand for physical illness.
If you have diabetes and are not managing your blood sugar, this can have a huge impact on your capacity to manage your emotions.
If there is medication you are supposed to take to manage your health, getting out of routine and missing doses will impact your emotional capacity.
Physical illness like a cold can make you wonky, so make sure you rest and focus on recovery.
If you’re in pain, do what you need to do to manage it, as this also contributes to emotion dysregulation.
Taking care of your physical health is vital to being able to regulate your emotions.
Eating
The "E" in PLEASE is about eating. Everyone’s body is a little different, but the essential idea is to keep fuel in your body by eating regular meals throughout the day. Skipping meals or packing all your calories in one sitting compromise your metabolism, digestion, and brain function.
Try and focus on eating the right macros throughout the day so that your body and brain can do what they need to do to regulate.
Avoiding Alcohol or Other Drugs
The "A" in PLEASE stands for avoiding alcohol or other drugs. No judgment—you’re doing the best you can to survive in a this chaotic world. However, alcohol and other drugs can have a huge impact on your ability to make sense of the world. They can also numb you out, making it harder to regulate emotions. If you’re trying to regulate your emotions, consider cutting back on your substance use.
Sleep
The "S" in PLEASE stands for sleep. Your brain requires adequate sleep in order to function. Some tips for basic sleep hygiene:
Try to go to bed and wake up at the same time every day.
Avoid screens like television and phones up to 30 minutes before bed.
Try not to eat a large meal just before bed time, as digestion can keep you up.
Reserve your bed, if possible, for only sleep-related activites
Your body needs REM sleep in order to heal, to process information, to dream, or to store your short-term memories into long-term memory. If you’re not sleeping well, consider talking to a doctor as sleep apnea or other issues could be at play. Without good quality REM sleep, everything else falls apart.
Exercise
The last "E" in PLEASE stands for exercise. You don’t need to necessarily "go touch grass" or hit the gym. Moving your body for at least 20 minutes a day can make a difference for your brain’s capacity to regulate emotions.
Consider going for a walk.
Dance while listening to music.
Go up and down some stairs a few times.
Check your mail across the street.
Any kind of physical activity helps. Exercise can trick the nervous system into calming down when you’re experiencing fight or flight. Incorporating it into your routine can help bring you to a more peaceful place.
Conclusion
Welcome back, students, to your Spring 2025 semester course of Emotion Regulation 101.
I am your adjunct “professor,” AffectorOfChange, a licensed clinical social worker and a therapist who is certified in EMDR therapy.
If you have questions, feel free to reach out. I’d love to hear what helps you PLEASE take care of your body so that you can better regulate your feelings.
Stay tuned for next week’s lesson on negotiating boundaries as part of emotion regulation.